So me in something other than knee-length board shorts and a muscle shirt is as far out of the question as you can possibly get. You see, I’m a bigger white guy with extra lumps and bits that tend to escape if not properly contained. But when I go I have to actively work at not embarrassing either myself, my kids, or the entire beach-going community as a whole. They are kids and they are just barely beginning to understand the subtle nuances of Tween and Teen fashions so they don’t care what they wear as long as it isn’t a Speedo or a bikini. I take my kids to our local beach pretty regularly because it’s summer and we live in Michigan and that means humid like a Swedish Sauna. But I am and I know it and nowhere is this more apparent than at the beach.
I have tattoos (though that’s pretty meaningless all in all since you can’t see them under short sleeves), and I rock cool Horror Movie T-Shirts my wife really, really hates.
I shave my head, because my rich, pubic thatch of hair would look abhorrently ridiculous done in gray overtones… even more so than it looks just being hair. But I do, pretty actively try not to look it. In age terms my children think they understand, I am old the world was in black and white when I was a kid, evidently I met Jesus -literally, and the 80’s were a hundred years ago.